Born This Way - Review

Finally, after a leak on Wednesday morning, Interscope could protect it no more. Born This Way had leaked, 5 hours before it was set to stream legally online. The normal edition was swiftly followed by the leak of the special editions tracks. So has Lady GaGa set her aims to high, pronouncing this as album of the year? Has she achieved this grand but controversial statement? I, Robert (MonsterRobert), have reviewed the entire album. Enjoy. 

01 - Marry The Night 

In GaGaVision, episode 43, the instrumental of this played. As it filled our eardrums, our hearts dropped. This was to be the third single and the first track on the album? But it was horrendous? How could this be? Then we heard the song in full. We couldn't be any more wrong. It was amazing. The vocals, lyrics and the most spectacular ending of a song since the start of the current millennium. 10/10 

02 - Born This Way 

Okay. As you can see, I gave this ten out of ten. That doesn't mean that it is the best song ever! However, this song is so simply amazing. It is over produced, cheesy and what the fuck is "capital H-I-M"? But that is irrelevant. This song has its flaw indeed but the feeling that I personally get from this song is something that I have never had in my life. Finally, I song with depth which isn't a melodramatic moan of pain. Utterly brilliant. Something that Madonna and Express Yourself could never do in a million years. 10/10

03- Government Hooker 

The opera starts and... Some slow version of it starts playing? What? How could this be? Is this a mistake? I am gutted. That aside it is lyrically simple which adds to child like quality to it. A major disappointment but a good song none the less. Shame about the speed. 7/10 Upon speeding it up, 10/10 

04 - Judas 

Judas is a traditional Lady GaGa song. Big hooks, big verses, ridiculous vowel sounds and a massive chorus. Shame this one has a crap chorus. That aside, this is a superb song which has not received the attention it deserved. Due to the chorus, this looses 2 full marks. 8/10 

05 - Americano 

This is Eurovision music. Like a Mexican ABBA, brought back from the dead. Simply bizarre. As of yet, one of the best songs on the album. Maybe not a big enough club banger without any heavy bass but still a great song. The ending is quite the cliff hanger though which is disappointing. 8/10 

06 - Hair 

This song proves that Red One and Lady GaGa do have some versatility. Although the first half of the song is a poor reflection of how good the second half is. 7/10 

07 - Scheiße 

Nothing is more sexy than Lady GaGa speaking German. Then the bass kicks in with  the Dracula inspired synths. A great chorus and a great message. This song is proving Red One and GaGa can make good songs which don't sound like Poker Face and Bad Romance. One of the highlights of the album. Utterly superb. 10/10 

08 - Bloody Mary 

We can't quite put our finger on this song. It's awful but yet some parts of it are simply amazing. The verses are one of the album yet but that chorus is plain crap. Although the bridge is good. 6/10 

09 - Bad Kids 

The song started and we started cringing. One of those look-down-at-the-ground-as-there's-nothing-better-to-do moments. Then the verses started. Oooh. I am liking this. A bit bad ass but not like one of those self proclaiming bad ass songs. Once again the chorus is crap. 7/10 

10 - Highway Unicorn (Road to Love) 

This song is okay but that chorus... It rips through us. That is all. 6/10 

11 - Heavy Metal Lover 

A bit too Bloody Mary for my liking. Buy good non the less. Although it does contain the best lyrics ever. "I want your whisky mouth all over my blonde south." Priceless. And the choruses are still crap. 7/10 

12 - Electric Chapel 

Lady GaGa used to have some of the best choruses. No longer. Just when I thought Judas was an exception, she proves me wrong. The pre chorus sounds like a better chorus. 7/10 

13 - Yoü and I 

Shania Twain meets Queen. I great record wish isn't like that ridiculous Speechless. Simple and perfect until you remember the entire bloody song is about that mongrel Lüc Carl. 9/10 

14 - The Edge of Glory

Divine. 10/10 

The Special Edition tracks:

01 - Black Jesus † Amen Fashion 

This song wouldn't seem out of place on a Madonna record. Before any Madonna fans start complaining, it has a Madonna vibe, it hasn't actually copied anything, not that GaGa has copied her. Quite good doing but really doesn't need to be quite as long as it is. 7/10 

02 - Fashion of his Love 

 Bringing back the 80's? Yes. This sounds like the kind of songs they sing in Sister Act. Lyrically, pretty crap but I am enjoying that drum sound from the 90's and the return of the cow bell. 6/10 

03 - The Queen 

Too cheesy. But now, we have discovered what her tweet meant about the fame and riches. Generally shit. 3/10


Overall, this album garners 8/10. Some epic moments, some awful songs but overall, good. The Fame: Monster was consistent. Born This Way has either good or shit songs. Shame the bad songs aren't even that bad, it is those woeful choruses.


Best Songs: Scheiße, Marry The Night, Born This Way, Edge of Glory and Government Hooker when it is speed up.


Worst songs: Highway Unicorn (Road 2 Love), Bloody Mary, Fashion of His Love and The Queen.


Single Predictions: Scheiße, Marry The Night or Americano.